Mothering is a big responsibility. There is no mother test or license required before a woman can become a mother. Think about it, the moment a child is born the mother is also born. I believe that most mother's do the best they can with what they have and what they know. If they knew better, prayerfully they would have done better. God's grace is sufficient to cover all the heartaches, pains, and bitterness birthed through our perceptions of neglect, distance, and lack of love from our mothers.
I thank God for each of you who had and have great relationships with your moms. You are a blessed! That is not every one's reality. Some of us have challenging relationships with our mothers as a result of generations of unresolved mother-daughter conflict. Often we are attempting to heal old wounds that predate our present relationships. We should be attempting to heal these wounds or we are destined to pass these issues on to our own daughters, to their daughters and generations to follow. This is the way of generational curses. Think back within your own genealogy, how did your mother and her mother communicate and get along? Does that explain some of your own mother-daughter woes?
We don't get to choose our mothers. God did the choosing for us before we knew Him. Because we know that God does not make mistakes, we have to play the hand we are dealt. Good, bad or indifferent our mothers are still...our mothers. We have to choose to work through our issues in these relationships if we want to be healed and see change for future generations.
Yes, it takes time, courage, effort, energy, grace, prayer, and love. If we have unresolved issues with our mothers we have to confront them and address them sometimes day by day if we are going to be all that God calls us to be and if our families are going to live out their purposes in Him.
For those of you who still have young daughters that you are raising, I pray that you are taking every opportunity to nurture your relationships. Pour love into your daughters and show them what it means to be godly. Talk with them. LISTEN. Guide them. Hug them! Don't settle for relationships like your own relationship with your mother. No matter how good you think it was...make it better by God's power. Creating healthier relationships takes work and commitment.
For those of you who are estranged from your mothers. Forgiveness is the key to a healthier you and healthy-loving relationships with your families and others. Creating healthier people also requires work and commitment. God can walk with us, but WE have to do the work.
As we reflect on Mother's Day and what it means to us remember that none of us was ever placed on this earth just for ourselves...to satisfy our own needs, to minister to ourselves, to bring joy and happiness to ourselves. Each of us was created for a purpose; that purpose is outside of ourselves and has to do with serving, choosing, and loving God in everything we do. By His power give a little of yourself this weekend, wherever God guides you, even if it is not reciprocated.
Your body is the temple of the Living God! Live Well in His Name!
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